Friday, June 13, 2008

HULK SMASH EXPECTATIONS!!!

Last Night I saw the Incredible Hulk. I hypothesize that some guy in the back of Marvel’s movie studio said “Hey! Why can’t we make a good comic book movie?” Then x-men was made, and then they said “That was fun! Can we do it again?” Several movies later (ignoring FF4 original hulk and elektra) now we have The Hulk.


To quickly sum up without spoiling the movie; the movie makers apologize to the audience for that blunder of an Ang Lee film by knocking that first piece of trash hulk movie out of the water in all categories..

They made the movie a sequel…kind of. Since a background story was established the that abortion of a first movie, they skip right over that whole explanation thing by recapping it in the opening credits.

And a few more awesome points

-They make the hulk look like ed norton

-Several awesome cameos (including a recent comic book hero turned movie star don’t worry I didn’t ruin anything)

-Awesome references to the Hulk show

-They give the hulk it’s own pair of hulk hands

-Parkour + The Hulk=One word “HULKOUR”

To quote Kevin in his Iron Man post “if you're not a comic follower you'll love it. if you ARE, then this is a guaranteed must own, once it gets to DvD, that you'll enjoy to have amongst your collection.”

9 Gamma Irradiated Beards

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Files, Filing, Filing Cabinets

I've spent approximately the last 5 days at work in a storage closet moving files and re-alphabetizing them. Let's say, if I never have to do something like this I'd be a-ok with it. However, it has given me time to think about the whole idea of files and filing and file cabinets.

My main complaint is that considering we live in the information age, and that most people (at least in this great country) have access to a computer and the internet, why the fuck do we still have paper files? I went to the doctor a few days ago (6 Beards) and their whole office had gone paperless, but yet where I work we still keep track of everything on paper. And by track of everything, I mean we probably have between 300 and 400 active students with approximately 75 graduating every Fall and Spring. Would it really be that hard to switch over to electronic files?

This would be great because it would eliminate the super tedious task of filing, a task that is very prone to difficulties and mistakes. Someone has a file out and someone else goes to file something in that file? Where'd it go? Who has it? I can't find it so I'm sticking it in the unfilable bin. Or, say I've found the right file, think I have my finger on it, look away to grab the piece of paper/information, turn back and stick the paper in the wrong file and POOF that piece of information is lost to all efforts shy of tearing apart all the files and hunting it down.

The other problem with all this is filing cabinets. Filing cabinets SUCK. None of them are designed at a good height, and any extensive amount of filing always results in some kind of unnecessary and prolonged bending over and/or squatting. Also, as I learned today, if you're using a filing cabinet that is 4+ drawers high, never EVER have more then one drawer pulled out at a time. Not even on accident. It will fall, possibly on you, and either way you will have to catch it and probably have a drawer fall out (which luckily for me the files stayed in even while completely 90 degrees and perpendicular to the ground). So, yeah. Two drawers. Don't forget it.

Also, note that this is me whining about files, and filing and not about my job which is awesome because it's inside during the summer heat. I love my job. My job gets 7 Beards. It would get more if I got paid more.

Paper Files get 3 Beards
Filing gets 1 Beard
File Cabinets get 3 Beards

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Coffe, Sugar, Starbucks, and Makin' Money

I was never a big coffee drinker for most of my life, and I have to admit that I'm still not a real big coffee drinker. I don't really go out of my way to get some, and I don't often drink any after noon. Coffee, that is, not alcohol. I drink plenty of alcohol after noon, don't you worry. But, yeah, I've come to find that really enjoy coffee, especially when I get the sugar/cream/coffee ratio just right. I must say thought that the cup I'm drinking right now tastes more like some just ran some water over the beans and into my cup rather than any kind of brewing took place. Can you say weak?

Anyways, what sparked this whole thing is that I spent an hour this morning in the break room with my co workers. Just manging on a delicious cinnamon roll and drinking coffee. An, also tearing up the 40 or so packets of sugar I stole from Starbucks and pouring them into our sugar container. It was a pretty sweet way to make $7.50, let me tell you.

Coffee gets 7 Beards.
Starbucks gets 3 Beards.
Stealing sugar from Starbucks gets 5 Beards.
Spending an hour drinking coffee and making money gets 8 Beards.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Pregnancy

This is about the funniest thing I've seen in a while. I really want to get to know this pregnant chick.

this gets like 7 beards and a moustache
http://www.theselfishbastard.com/pregnancy-tips-for-dummies/

Friday, May 23, 2008

Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of The Crystal Skull

Alright, to be honest this post should've been up like 2 days ago, but I've been distracted by three things: the massive archives of Scary-Go-Round, Dr. Apollo von Pizza, and marker fumes. They are very distracting indeed. But, enough wish-wash. We went to the 12:01 showing at our local theater, and let me just say I am very glad we went and saw it before pretty much 99% of everyone else who will ever watch this movie. No, really I am.

So, honestly it's been twenty years since the last Jone's flick, but I am convinced that Harrison Ford gets into this costume on the weekends and pretends to be Indiana like Jews celebrate the Sabbath, dutifully, regularly, and from sundown till sunup. He was pretty swell. Karen Allen's return was pretty swell, and the development of her character was nice too. She was no longer the smarmy, smart-mouthed lush she was in Raiders, but was much more fitting with what had happened to her in between. They also very neatly wrote out some old characters, and added some excellent new characters. These new people being of course Shia TheBeef and Cate Blanchett. I thought both played their characters excellently, and really helped flesh out plot of the movie.

*****SPOILER ALERT******




As for the plot, I thought it was well conceived and an excellent late 40's continuation of the kind of things Indiana Jones had experienced and sought after in the original three films. The transition from Nazis to Russians was (to me at least) the only logical choice and I'm glad it was made rather then going for some kind of rebel Nazi group fighting on in the Fuhrer's memory. This was already excellently done by Hellboy and others and did not need to be reiterated. While the whole alien skull thing may have been a tough pill for some to swallow, I thought it made perfect sense. It fit right in with the scientific and military priorities of Russia at the time as well as many popular, if not decried, theories about early human civilization. Bravo to George and David for bringing us a fine story and a fine script.




******SPOILERS OVER********





Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of The Crystal Skull (forever after to be refered to as Indiana Jones 4) gets Seven Beards and A Mustache.